Tag: Why women choose a male escort

Why Do Women pay for sex

Why Do Women pay for sex ?


The most frequently asked question I get asked by women and sometimes by men, who are not clients, is “ why do women pay for sex ”?

So I have found myself asking my clients why they have chosen to use a service such as mine, and I have found the answers or reasons given can be varied and unique, however there are some common responses and reasons that are given and I think will be apparent why in today’s society.

Apparently, if men want sex and pay for it, its accepted, “yes well that is men for you”!! But do women not have the same desires? well apparently so, maybe not the same fantasy as what a male is looking for but never the less, women have desires of an intimate nature.

Since I commenced escorting in 2003, I have found that in about 2010, the industry boomed. Some of this may be because of social acceptance, smartphones and the internet, and movies like 50 Shades of Grey.

No matter the growth in male escorting, the reasons are still the same. So, what have women told me?

First maybe the best way to describe who uses my service is to also put them into a demographics

50 % of my work has been single or married women, while the other 50 % are couples. Of those

  • Women – 50 % are married and the other 50 % are single, usually 40 years to late 60’s
  • Couples – 90 % married and usually 45 years to late 60’s
  • 80 % of my clients are regulars in both categories

This demographic has not changed since I was 37 when I first started. rarely would I get people below the age of 35 in either category, but I still get the odd few that are outside those age groups.

So, what are the reasons given by women.

1)  It’s safer than having an affair

A lot of women that have used my service once or on an ongoing basis. Our connections, feeling, mutual attractions may and are often real, but at the end of the day, nothing can come about from it like the risks that are associated with an affair.

There is often a desire to experiment after having a mismatched sex drive with their partner – and hence want sex, but not an affair. They can enter a secure safe place or a public bar, get to know the person, but always aware of what is around the corner.

Not one client I have ever seen has felt guilty after their experience with me, and in fact that’s often the fear they have before we meet. An escort is not a means of finding if the grass is greener on the other side. However, if often awakens many different feelings, about life, their passion, their relationship.

I have been seeing some clients for over 10 years now and to some extent I am the glue I their relationship, even though the partner may be totally aware of my existence. There are no physical records of credit card transactions, often initial contact or subsequent bookings are made by email and the whole experience is held in strict confidence between the client and escort.

2) It’s convenient and easier than online dating.

I am surprised how hard it is for single and married women to find good men out there. There is a male shortage out there. Its seems strange but Online dating consumes a lot of time, men are not what they say they are and don’t resemble their pictures.

So sometimes women like to shake it up a bit and hire a professional who knows what he is doing, but always, the woman is in control.

I come across of lot of women who have been treated appallingly by men, who show no respect or common courtesies, let alone know what a woman wants or needs.

Single mums are probably the largest single category of women that use my service. They are time poor, juggling kids, family/ money and the home on their own. I must admit I love those situations where I do everything for the, I let them know it’s about them and for once they don’t have to worry about anything.

3) The deeply concealed secret fantasy!

This is very common, inspired by movies or their own sexual desires or fantasy, they want to have that experience. An experience where you are free to give voice to your most deeply concealed fantasies and live them out in safe, judgement free space? with someone who knows exactly what they are doing, where everything is completely under your control? It not uncommon that women cannot discuss these fantasies with their partner, so they seek out someone like me.

The women who see me are not interested in just any old sex; they were after something far more fulfilling than that.

Women that I spoke to have held deep emotions around their experiences with me, however all had felt empowered by their choice to engage me to meet their physical and emotional needs.

4) Women don’t get the sensual romantic needs at Home.

This one surprises me the most. Very attractive women, that may have a normal or higher sex drive, or need for sensual romantic needs that I am able to provide. Half the guys out there do not know what they already have. It’s not always the case, but a lot of men when they reach a certain age, just lose their Mojo.

So, some seek me out because they miss the sexual touch and intimacy. But many women wanted something different. Often, they had sexual fantasies of being spanked, tied up, or dominated in some way.

Although this is an incredibly common fantasy, it’s not an easy one to live out. The levels of trust required are considerable. Many of the women I have spoken to described feelings of shame around their fantasy. Others spoke of the difficulty of inviting a partner into their private fantasy life, and of not quite getting it ‘right’ when they did.

The experience often makes women feel closer to their husband / partner. Its seems unusual. However, it’s a very real reaction I often get after woman have seen me, and they are often surprised themselves how they felt. They often do not feel guilty about what they have done.

5) I don’t want to be alone in a strange city.

Usually women travelling married or single, these women often admit they never ever thought they would consider paying for sex. Often the booking starts out as a companion, dinner date drinks, But the option is always there for more. 95 % of women want more, but 100 % never regret what they have done.

So often a woman travelling, on holidays and bored, single mums, or generally a planned rendezvous, there is often a fantasy or sexual desire to have sex with a stranger. But it must be safe and with someone who knows what they are doing.

6 ) I Just want a sensual massage. 

It’s not always about sex, some women just want a massage with the touch from a male while both are naked. The soft touches add a level of excitement and often is enough to provide that release that a woman may be after.

It may be that the woman may be looking for more, but they are uncertain of what they want or how to express their desires.

7) I want someone that knows what he is doing. 

It’s not always about sex, some women just want a massage with the touch from a male while both are naked. The soft touches add a level of excitement and often is enough to provide that release that a woman may be after.

Visiting a male escort can be a major milestone on the path to reclaiming their right to receiving erotic pleasure. There is a need to create a safe space in which to explore sexual desires which is a reoccurring theme with the women I have seen.